Not a Detour: Tour to Responsibility


Two years ago, I told myself, “I am resigning”. I said it like a thorn was being removed. It was quite a relief, so i told my close friends about it. I prepared my resignation very well.  A month or two had passed and I still hesitated to hand it over. I never did (now the backup is nowhere).

Changing career is not new and there are various reasons. But this is almost something unknown to an employee who dedicated long years to a company, he or she worked with  after or outside student life. While it is easy for others to think about quitting their job, it is difficult with people who have family to support or sick loved ones at home. A lot of things are to be considered before finally diving into unemployment status. Mine is about my sick mother who was stroked 3 years ago and underwent acute myoma operation after a year that stroke hit her.

It was a storm in our family, but a storm that taught us the value of saving money, preparing health security benefits, applying for a memorial package plan (which offended me at first), running the house clean, cooking (on my side as the eldest) and most of all budgetting (add the medical rehab). Yes, lots of household adjustments has to be done particularly who will pay this bill and that bill.

I can recall how I felt weakened with this idea that our mother won’t be working anymore. It was horrible to think about, because we are used to having our mother shoulder the expenses at home. Now I see I needed to be taught how to finally be responsible with my money, our house, and family.

I‘m speaking in view of the eldest sister. And I agree, most of the time eldest sons and daughters carry more expectations of themselves compared to other siblings. I think this is also what younger siblings expect us to do.  I do not wish to be the youngest or tease them either, but it’s good to have someone older that you can call “Ate” (older sister) or “Kuya” (older brother) in your family. No wonder, sometime in the past I longed to have someone to call Ate or Kuya too.

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It has been three years since that storm of challenge came in our family. And I still couldn’t believe that we made it without our mother’s stretched arms. Instead, we made it with our own arms stretched for her and for each other. Of course, those various challenges that every one of us face will not be brought to us if we are not able to surpass it. The Lord is faithful when you trust and commit your ways to His.

I thank the Lord with all the prayer, planning, and preparation, I can now say that “I am ready for resignation”. And hope for the best to explore another field He is leading me.